EASY PORNOSTRIP OF THE WEEK - The Safest Sex

Jerry:

HELP! HELP ME! SOMEONE? CAN ANYONE HEAR ME?!?!?!

Donna:

Shut up Jerry! It’s just me. You know I hate it when you whine like a little bitch so quit it!

Donna:

Sometimes I wonder if I’m a lesbian, being attract-ed to a soft girl like you...

Jerry:

Please Donna, just hear me out. I want to talk.

Donna:

There’s holes in the mask, so you can talk if you want.

Jerry:

Thank you Donna. Listen, when I told you that I want-ed to practice safe sex, I didn’t mean all of this!

Jerry:

I mean, we don’t have to be in latex suits, do we? We could just have normal sex with a condom. Come on, what do you say?

Donna:

No, Jerry. I thought we understood each other. When you said you wanted to use protection I put this whole thing together. Now is not the time to pull out.

Donna:

I mean, look at you. You’re in a skin tight latex suit, wrapped up in a tight latex bag with your dick out. You’re in a pretty vulnerable place my friend.

Donna:

You’re soft and vulnerable, but your dick is hard. Mmmm, and tasty. Jerry: Oh, gawd!

Donna:

That’s right, I’m your latex goddess and you are my penis in a condom. Get harder for me.

Jerry:

Oh my gawd!

Donna:

Oh we can make this even safer. I’m going to rock your cock with this red handle.

Jerry:

What are you doing to me?

Donna:

You must think I’m crazy. Well, maybe you’re right. I’m crazy about safe sex!

Donna:

Now lick me while I sit on your face! More! I’m going to pump my fist harder now.

Jerry:

(Muffled) Mmmmmm!

Donna:

Yes, right there! YES! You are the fucking boss. I’ll do whatever you want. Give me an order, now!

Jerry:

Don’t stop until I come! Oh yeah!

Jerry:

Wholly, fucking hell that was intense.. I’ve never felt… so...so...zzzzzzzz.

Donna:

Hunh?

Donna:

He, he, he! He’s so cute when he snores!

EASY PORNOSTRIP OF THE WEEK - OVER-MASTURBATORS ANONYMOUS

OVER-MASTURBATORS ANONYMOUS

Amber: Another Tuesday night, alone. *Sigh* I’ve got to be strong...

Amber: ...I have to remember what I learned at the Over-Masturbators Anonymous meeting last week: keep your hands in a safe place...

Amber: ...look at your hands. Your hands are beautiful. They are for making music...

Amber: ...they are for typing on keyboards and giving applause after watching a great performance...

Amber: ...hands are for… hmm, petting pussy cats and giving deep massages… oh, why did I have to think of that?

Amber: I don’t know if this hand trap device is going to be enough to hold me off.

Amber: There! These cuffs should help me keep my legs closed...

Amber: ...but then again, I do love a challenge. Oh my god, I can feel my pussy jumping. It wants to be attacked! It’s a good thing this zipper is locked because I really want to get inside.

Amber: No, I have to hold on. I can do this. I can go without mastur-bating for more than 12 hours this time...

Amber: … oh, all of this frustration is exhausting! I’m so tense, and I can’t even touch myself to take the edge off.

Amber: This is crazy. I’m horny and sleepy at the same time. Zzzzz.

Amber: What’s going on, am I dreaming? I’m still so turned on, what is this?

Amber: I can’t even remember that stupid mantra now! Look at your hands… something, something...

Amber: ...oh yes, my hands are for making music. Hello, where did this delicious dildo come from? I think I’ll play a little...

Amber: ...wait, my zipper’s undone! I can make much better music if I get my instrument a little wet. Like when you play the clarinet, the reed has to stay moist...

Amber: ...because that way the vibrations of the—oh YES! YES! YES! It feels amazing!! All of this anticipation’s made me hungry for banana cream pie.

Amber: Oh yes, this is amazing! Everything I want is cummmmmmmmmmming!!! Oh, yes, yes, again!

Amber: Oh shit, if not masturbating gives me access to super sexy fuck dreams, I think I can do this! Wait a second is there a snake moving beside me??!

Amber: Urg, that was just some stupid rope! Damn it, it’s all gone!!!

READ ANOTHER FUN EASY PORN STRIP HERE

EASY PORNOSTRIP OF THE WEEK - Latex Suit Jokester

Latex Suit Jokester

Kim: Oh my gosh, I’m so nervous my hands are getting sweaty.
Tom: Oh?

Kim: I just seriously can’t believe my good luck in getting the part.
Tom: Hm.

Kim: I mean I’ll be playing the part of Storm in the new X-Men Movie!
Tom: Ya, hang on I’ll be right back.

Kim: Da, da, da, da, di, di, dah. Da, da, da, da, di, di, dah. Da, da, da, da, di, di, dah. X-Men!

Tom: Ahem, so did you get the script that we sent you?
Kim: Ya, sure. By the way, thanks for helping me with these boots.

Tom: You’re welcome. So you got it, and you read it?
Kim: Um, kinda.

Tom: Are you trying to tell me that you’ve come on set to play a part that you don’t have a clue about?
Kim: No, no, of course not! I’ve read the script.

Tom: Okay, then you know that we aren’t filming the new X-Men movie.
Kim: Well, in a way, no we aren’t.

Kim: What I mean to say is that I am playing the part of Storm: a powerful woman who controls nature with her emotions.
Tom: What?

Tom: Let me just come right out and ask: you know we’re filming a porno right?
Kim: Ha! Yeah, I was totally messing with you!

Tom: That’s a pretty good one, but I have to tell you that I really don’t like jokes.
Kim: Oh, come on Tom, everyone likes a good joke!

Kim: Hey, Tom are you still there? You’re not going to leave me like this are you? I was just kidding!
Tom: (Leaving the room) No it’s funny. I’m going to laugh hysterical-ly as I leave you all alone in this room.

Hidden camera man: Wow, this girl is really getting into character!